Dear Friends,
On a Monday morning at the end of February, I pulled up my blind in my living room to what to me was a horror show. What had been a large lot of beautiful tall majestic evergreen trees that framed my window perfectly, were now being bulldozed down. And within 4 hours’ time the 1/3-acre lot across the street had been completely decimated. I was devastated and cried for several days. My dear friends, had been taken down without any consciousness or caring, it seemed, and it hurt deeply. I knew a construction company had bought the lot a couple months before this. I had been envisioning and imagining the trees remaining or at least some of the trees. That did not happen.
As the lot was being cleared across the street, my internet and phones went down. I work from home and was sure it was because of the chaos across the street and the phone company confirmed this was probably the case. Our lines are buried underground, and it made sense that something was disrupted. Those huge tree roots went deep. I went out to talk to the tree guys who were overseeing the project, and just as I started talking to one of them a gorgeous beautiful huge evergreen tree came down right in front of me. I was in tears, and I said out loud, “that is so sad”. The young man who I had approached made fun of me and mocked me. I was shocked to say the least. Looking back, I know that he took my feelings as a confrontation to his work, but nonetheless, it added insult to injury.
When I was a child, we had a beautiful large Maple tree in our backyard. I remember the day the tree was taken down and I was very, very sad. The tree was removed to have a built-in swimming pool put in which would create excitement in most children. However, if someone had asked me if I preferred the pool or the tree, I would have emphatically chosen the tree. I loved that tree. We played baseball around it and hide and seek. It was our friend and protector. I have always experienced the living essence in trees, and I need trees around me to feel at peace wherever I reside.
So why am I sharing this experience with you. If we are all creators of our own reality, then how the heck did I create this reality of losing those beautiful trees. Many people might say that the lot was destined to be cleared and a house built and those trees were never mine. And that is true in one reality. However, I also believe that we can shift our so called reality by envisioning and feeling into a reality that is more in alignment with our needs, wants and desires. This experience has allowed me an opportunity to go deeper and reflect on my belief systems.
A good friend of mine and spiritual teacher shares she feels this is a co-creative universe. One in which we create along with a higher power. I decided to ask myself, “Can I allow that there might be a greater plan in store for me, something even better than what I had experienced with those trees?”. And most times, I can open to that thought but, in this case, it has been challenging. Every morning for two years, I would raise my blind and feel such peace with looking at those magnificent beings. I would step out onto my front porch and breathe in their sweet essence and commune with them. These moments of connection brought me such peace. So, it feels like a bit of a stretch to think that there is something better being created for me.
When difficult times arise, it helps to reach for better feeling thoughts about whatever is occurring in our lives in that moment. Even if it feels like you are grasping at straws, so to speak. As we reach for better feeling thoughts, our energy opens, and we can allow in the energy of well-being. My thoughts have been going along like this: “Well, at least the porta potty is green and not black or tan”. (Okay, that was a stretch early on in this experience): “Well, the construction workers seem to be fairly tidy in their work and not leaving a lot of garbage around” or “The work seems to be going at a good pace, at least it will get done sooner”.
Can I say that I am on the other side of this situation and can finally see and feel how this experience has my higher good in mind. No, I cannot yet. But I can allow for the possibility of this. I can allow for the possibility that some wonderful people will move into the new home and create some beautiful landscaping and plant some wonderful trees. I can allow for the possibility that life truly does have my back and is bringing a really good friend to me or something wonderful that will transpire because of this creation.
When we shift from resistance to allowing the energy expands and then we become the creators of our realities. I can still feel the loss of the trees and experience my grief and sadness over losing them, but I can also experience allowing the possibility that there is something being created that my conscious self cannot yet grasp. Life and my higher self know my heart’s desires in ways that I cannot currently comprehend. There might be something just under the surface I have been yearning for that is just about to be manifested. If I can remain at peace, or as much as I can, with, what is occurring in the moment, then I will have a better chance at recognizing the gift that is being given to me.
I know when life throws us curveballs such as life-threatening illnesses in ourselves or others, or we lose a cherished job, or something else devastating happens, it can be so difficult to lift our heads up out of the horror of what we are seeing and feeling in those moments. And at times, it might feel like it’s too much and we can’t take anymore. It can be so hard to believe that life/God/Source energy really has our highest good in mind during these times.
So how do you pull yourself out of the muck, the misery, the feeling that life is against you. You do it step by step. It’s often too difficult to go from hating an experience to loving it for what it has to offer. But you can reach for that better feeling thought even if it is as simple as stating, “I’m breathing, that is a good thing”. That is actually quite a profound statement. Or you could say, “Well, it’s easier to move today”, or “The health care providers really seem to want to help me” Or “The sky sure is a nice blue today and I am able to enjoy it”.
I put in front of my window that overlooks the construction, a beautiful large plant stand and put some lovely crystals and plants on it and some other beautiful items. So instead of my eyes going immediately to the construction across the street, my eyes go to the beautiful items on the plant stand and the birds in the feeder just outside the window. And I say, “I am grateful for finding this beautiful plant stand and that the birds continue to grace me with their sweet presence despite all the noise outside”.
I look forward to sharing with you what wonderful gift is coming my way from the universe. I am so grateful for the time I had with those trees and know that their spirit lingers on in other nature around here. I bless the young man who mocked me for my deep feelings over something that had much meaning for me, and I wish him well on his journey and hope that he finds a bit more conscious awareness in it of his own feelings about life. He was just reflecting to me how he mocked himself over his own deep nature.
I choose to believe that life really does have my best interest in mind, and I can be in a state of allowing this in, rather than in rejecting change and the unknown. I wish for all of you going through difficult times in life, that you can find a bit of peace every day and a bit of allowing. As you reach for those better thoughts and open to even the smallest bit of allowing, then eventually, the allowing will become the greater experience of your needs/wants and desires. Let’s choose this together.
Wishing you so many good things,
Rosemary