Dear Friends,
This time of year, many of us are contemplating about endings and new beginnings. However, what I wish to share about is the in between place. That space where endings are occurring in our lives and before the new possibilities arrive. I have written about this before, but I feel this middle ground bears witnessing again. This in between space, is the still place that sometimes can feel very frightening, and anxiety provoking. However, it can also bring on feelings of excitement and hopefulness. Often, whatever emotion we are experiencing has more to do with whatever the endings are and our past way of dealing with these times.
The most powerful space we can hold is the feeling of neutrality. In the quiet space of neutrality, all possibilities are held. We can hold a vision of what we are desiring, but it is always good to allow life to unfold from this quiet space. What life holds for us may be so much more powerful than what we were imaging for ourselves.
I have experienced many endings in the last several years. Relationships have been changing. People moving to other geographical locations or passing on to another realm. Or sometimes, our paths have turned away from each other as our souls were led in different directions. A good friend of mine shared with me that people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When we try to make a friendship that came together for a reason, into a lifelong friendship, then suffering and sadness can ensue. If we bless and accept the person who came into our lives for a short time, and who left for whatever reason even possibly through death, we maintain a more peaceful approach to life with less suffering.
Recently, a dear friend crossed over after being quite sick for several months. I think many of his friends are a bit shell shocked that he didn’t stay with us for much longer. His sweet wife shared over 30 years with him and hoped for many more. In this case, the ending was difficult. Even though we know his spirit lives on in another dimension, the loss of his physical presence is painful especially for his wife, and family.
Back in 2003 a new yard maintenance man had some wisdom he shared that still lingers with me today. My brother had just left this earth at the much too young age of 43 and I was sharing about his passing with this man who was becoming a friend. After I shared the story of my brother’s death, this wise humble soul said very quietly, “Rosemary, if you are patient long enough, you will receive gifts from your brother’s passing”. He said it with such power and yet humility that I knew he was speaking the truth. I also knew that he must have experienced some deep grief in his own life to have learned this bit of wisdom. I later found out that was the case.
And this man was right! That next year, I made 6 new friends at conferences and classes I was attending. Each of these people became close friends and we continue our friendship to this day. My friend who recently crossed over and his wife were 2 of these souls. Life is strange this way. It was so hard to lose my brother in the physical form. But the joy and support I have obtained from each of these new friends, has sustained me repeatedly through the years. And I was fortunate, I did not have to wait too long before these new gifts, in the form of new friends came into my life.
Sometimes, the in between place, seems like it is going on forever. Boredom can set in, and fear and anxiety if we let our negative minds take over. I am currently in a space of contemplating moving to a new location. I have been feeling pulled in this direction for a couple of years and the last year this feeling became stronger. Yet despite putting 2 offers on new homes, nothing has transpired. The housing market these days is quite crazy.
I was talking with my chiropractor about my lack of luck in the housing market, and he replied, “if a house is meant for you, you won’t be able to give it away”. He chuckled when he said this, but there is much truth in that statement. If my current house is where I am meant to be, I will be here for as long as the need is there. Even though I have a feeling of being pulled in a different direction, my challenge is to sit quietly in this space and experience whatever anxiety, boredom, or fear that I am feeling from an observatory place. I can continue to look, and move towards something that feels right, at the same time remaining in a quiet space of allowing what is meant for me to find me.
My friend who passed left a void in his wife’s life and heart. And she is experiencing much sadness and grief which is of course, totally normal. Her challenge will also be to allow these feelings to show up, to surface when they need to but to also find time to sit in the quiet of the in between space where life is preparing to bring her more gifts. These gifts could be in the form of other people, deepening relationships, or an even stronger connection with her current furry family. The space of the in between holds unlimited potential, gifts that only spirit, universal consciousness knows are for our highest good.
As we wind down 2021, and we think about New Year’s resolutions, my suggestion would be to resolve to allow that quiet space of the in between to envelope your life from a neutral perspective. There is nothing wrong with making resolutions, but it is much more powerful if you make them, and then offer them to the universal source of all that is, to allow them or something greater into your life for your highest good.
As you move towards this year’s ending, reflect on what has transpired in 2021 from a quiet, observatory space without judgement, or too much sadness if you can. Perhaps it was a very fun exciting year for you. Even if it was, I still suggest you observe whatever occurred from a quiet, neutral place. Then, if there are any fears that next year can’t possibly hold as much goodness for you as this year did, you might just be pleasantly surprised. The point is, we don’t know what the future holds. But if we can embrace the quiet of the in between and allow spirit to move whatever pieces around that need to find their way to us, than 2022 will be a magical, mystical time no matter what transpires.
I am wishing all of you many peaceful moments as 2021 winds down and 2022 arrives. There are many gifts for you waiting. Breathe, and allow the magic of the in between place to bring them to you.
Much love,
Rosemary